Flying Braless

I was sending an office memo today to notify my coworkers of a death.
Reading the deceased's obituary got me thinking about my own death.

I know we mourn the passing of others because we are so used to them being around, and we will miss them, however, I don't want some lame ass, boring funeral where everyone just cries and walks around eating food.  I also want my obituary to be more original.  Sure, my obituary can say who outlived me, and who already died, but I think I will pre-write my obituary with fill-in-the-blank spots for the names.  Maybe something similiar to this:

Rough Draft of my Obituary

Angelique lived an awesome existence; 

she loved hanging with Bea, 

attending many Phish shows & wearing happy pants, 

marrying Tim, raising Aiden, 

dancing to more Phish, 

getting fat then getting fit, 

spending times with her family & friends 

and petting pussies.  

Angelique also really loved:

 hula hoops, bubbles, things that glow, and things that bounce.

She was survived by: (list survivors.. don't forget surviving pets!)

She was predeceased by: (insert those that died before me; including pets!)

The celebration of Angelique's life & transitioning to her bodiless existence will be held:  (insert place and time).

Even though you might be sad or missing me, 

rejoice, because now, not only do I get to go braless, I can also fly!